The hiatus for the last few days has been because of the weekend -- a common theme I'm finding. Brittney and I kept busy without the kids. Friday we celebrated the college graduation of a friend. Saturday we celebrated Brittney's birthday (a big-one!) and Sunday we picked up the kiddos.
The biggest takeaway over the last few days took place yesterday and even today when we got home. Ezekiel loves the iPad and technology--like any 6-year old. On Sunday, after going out to eat with our pastor and his family with a few leaders at church--we headed home. Ezekiel had been a good listener, ate his food, and so he asked and I let him play on the iPad while his sister fell asleep for her nap. After about 30 minutes, the iPad battery died. He only had about 30 minutes left to play on it anyway, but I told him he could play later. Instead, I got out the old fishing game (battery operated fishery game that you have a fishing pole and try to catch the fish that open and close their mouths). We played for 45 minutes and when Brittney got home, he wanted to play with her, too. It was clear that 'quality time' was preferred to 'iPad time' when Ezekiel said before dinner: I'll play on the iPad tomorrow. He was loving the quality time. I felt as if that was his way of saying: I know time is limited---and I would rather play and create memories with you instead of playing on the iPad. Me too buddy, me too. Ashley was a grump on Sunday but was a peach today. A favorite memory to share that I won't forget about her is her love (like Ezekiel's) of playing 'chase.' Now that she can crawl (she was delayed), she absolutely loves getting a head start of crawling fast---and someone crawling after her quickly and grabbing at her. The. Giggles. Will. Melt. Your. Heart. How am I doing emotionally? I'm doing okay. I don't feel super anxious or stressed today. Ezekiel had a counseling visit today where the counselor brought all of us (his parents, me, and Ezekiel) in together to touch base and see how it was going. Since we haven't had issues---all systems are ahead. His counselor will see him next about a week and a half after moving back in with his parents. She commented how Ezekiel has grown (emotionally) and is obviously much more comfortable now than he was when she began seeing him. I verbalized my biggest concern was the loss and change for our little man. The counselor suggested that perhaps visits or phone calls could be helpful with that. Jackie and Grant (parents) said (which is true) that I have talked to them about us continuing to visit with and see the kids. Jackie told the counselor that with a common thread of United Methodism (church)---it's been good for them to trust and build a relationship with us with that common ground. We will be having a going-away party for the kiddos next weekend and I invited Jackie and Grant to that. They need to see that Ezekiel and Ashley are loved beyond just Brittney and me among our support system. I'm both anxious and excited for this--and hope it's the start of the 'hand-off' and next step in the kids lives with us. My lesson in parenting today to share is around the 'quality time' piece. While it's so much easier at times to rely on technology (and believe me, I am guilty here!) for entertainment. I've learned over the past few days that it's the quality time together that actually matters for kids. The technology, just like for adults, is an escape from reality for our children. The reality is more important for development, memories, and relationships. In this blog post, I would love to thank our caseworker, Jessica. Similar to what I've told many people about a boss: they will make or break your job experience---a caseworker will likely make or break your foster experience. Our kiddos were Jessica's first case that she was able to have from the children coming into care to the conclusion of their case. She's looked out for the kids and us probably more than I even know. She's taken my long-winded venting emails in stride. She's helped with transportation. She's seen the kids progress, grow, and is genuinely interested in helping us with whatever we need. Brittney and I have talked about how at none of the FST (Full Support Team) meetings have we been met with any surprises. Jessica has prepared us well, allowed us ample opportunity for feedback and opinions, and has done an incredible job of guiding the case. Not having any surprises is a big deal to make us feel supported and encouraged. Speaking of FST's -- tomorrow is likely going to be our last FST meeting. I'll probably post something tomorrow or Wednesday about the outcomes. We'll likely get confirmation of what we expect to be. Not counting tonight, the kids probably have 6 nights left in our house. (Wow--that's a bit shocking...to me). Until next time, thank you for reading! Craig
2 Comments
Carolyn
5/14/2018 08:33:21 pm
Craig,i commend you for
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Kelly
5/15/2018 05:48:46 am
In a time where ALL you hear is how broken the system is it OR how awful fostering parents are it’s very uplifting & refreshing(?) I am unsure what other words to use...to see people within the system working together for the REAL goal if uniting families to help kids grow & become well rounded & fulfilled adults ... not another broken stat.. I pray not only for YOU & Brit but the parents willing to work..your social worker Jessica & all other well meaning & wanting change within the system adults that slog thru this EVERY day & continues to go back every day... Courageous & wonderful
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AuthorHallsville resident. Foster Parent. School board member. Politico. Jesus Follower. Cardinals Fan #MizzouMade Archives
February 2019
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