It's been 2 months since my last blog. Much has happened, but I think, hope and pray that closure has been achieved, for me and for the family.
Closure. What do you think about when you think of that word? A quick Google provides three definitions, all (naturally) are similar. The third definition, is the essence of today's blog: "a feeling that an emotional or traumatic experience has been resolved." Since we've last visited, Brittney and I went on vacation for two weeks. I've changed jobs. We had Ezekiel and Ashley back in our home for three weeks unexpectedly when Jackie's mental health deteriorated. I'm going to be honest with you, those three weeks were incredibly difficult for all involved. We took the children back into our home after their parents voluntarily allowed the children to stay with us so they could focus in getting healthy again. I won't bore you with the uncertainties and questions that this created in our minds---but a relapse of mental health concerns after the children being back home for just a month was concerning in our minds for the long-term safety and stability of Ezekiel and Ashley. After returning to medication which had helped keep her Jackie stable for the previous year we had known her, Jackie's mental health returned to what gave us so much hope for a successful reunification just a month earlier. For the past two weeks they have (successfully) been reunified with their parents, Jackie and Grant. That leads me to today, where I hope closure had finally been reached. For many months, Jackie and Grant have discussed their desire to baptize Ezekiel and Ashley and reaffirm their baptism. As a newly commissioned deacon (June 2018) in the United Methodist Church, I became a minister of the church and could assist in the baptism when the time came. Under the direction of their senior pastor, I assisted in the baptism of Ezekiel and Ashley in their United Methodist church that they attend. During the service, my mind flashed back. On May 21, 2017, I was given the opportunity to guest preach at that same church---and facilitate in a visit between the parents and children. Today, 62 weeks later, I was blessed with the opportunity to be a part of the ceremony and assist in baptizing Ezekiel and Ashley. What solidified the word closure in my mind today? Pastor Rice was preaching about feeding of the 5000 (Mark 6:30-44) and in describing the miracle, he compared the miracle to God's miracle of sending Jesus in this way: We (the people, sinners) minus (-) me (Jesus) equals (=) You (being saved, free from burdened with sin). Where did my mind go? I'm sure it may be blasphemous to try to fit that metaphor into my life, but here's where my mind went: We (Community) minus (-) me (foster parent) equals (=) You (Jackie and Grant have their children again at home). Closure. The first definition of Closure (if Googled) is: "the act or process of closing something." Our Christian baptism is the process of being admitted into the Christian faith by becoming purified through the act of baptism. In other words, by baptism's very nature closes out our previous life and opens a new one. In our interactions today, Jackie's mental health was in really good shape. Grant's attention to the children was exceptional and positive. Ezekiel was positive throughout the whole morning and only broke down when his peppermint fell out of his mouth and on the nasty, wet ground as we were leaving. Ashley was herself--walking consistently now---only to whine and cry when I was within sight or taken away from me. My buddy (Ashley) loves me dearly, and is bonded to me in a way that could bring me to tears at any point in time that you talk to me in person. That said, it brought a smile to my face she sat quietly (when she wasn't babbling to herself) during church next to her mom and dad, confirming where she should be. Closure. An emotional experience resolved, or brought to an end. I know that our story and relationship with Ezekiel and Ashley won't end here. However, this chapter, I pray, has. As of my last post, I thought, closure had been reached--but verbalized it in different language. God, I pray, delayed closure for it to take place today. Today was a day of closure and new beginnings. Baptisms and new life in Christ. Reassurance of mental health stability. Revisiting a congregation that I had visited 62 weeks ago under very different circumstances. Helping with my first baptism as a pastor. I leave you with this link. In the United Methodist Church, we sing a song called "This Is A Day of New Beginnings." I leave you with the words to the hymn, which provide hope for me, Brittney, Jackie, Grant, Ezekiel, and Ashley after today---when we celebrate closure and new beginnings. Until next time, Thank you for reading and sharing in this journey with me. Craig "This Is A Day of New Beginnings" - Brian Wren This is a day of new beginnings, time to remember, and move on, time to believe what love is bringing, laying to rest the pain that's gone. For by the life and death of Jesus, love's mighty Spirit, now as then, can make for us a world of difference as faith and hope are born again. Then let us, with the Spirit's daring, step from the past, and leave behind our disappointment, guilt and grieving, seeking new paths, and sure to find. Christ is alive, and goes before us to show and share what love can do. This is a day of new beginnings; our God is making all things new.
1 Comment
Wilma
7/29/2018 01:22:57 pm
Know this is an emotional time for you and Brittney and the family you have been with. What a wonderful blog you have worded Craig. God has blessed you and Brittney with a heart of caring. Love you both. Grandma Stevenson
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AuthorHallsville resident. Foster Parent. School board member. Politico. Jesus Follower. Cardinals Fan #MizzouMade Archives
February 2019
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